The Power of Detachment

There is a calm when you let go. There is a calm when you surrender. There is a calm when you recognize while you may not be happy with what is, it is what is. So after two weeks of crying and a crazy roller coaster ride things are starting to settle. The purge has happened and now comes action. I am not saying there won't be sad days or crying but there is a grounded feeling that comes with surrender. I have and am surrendering. A friend sent me an email recently on the power of detachment and this really hit home for me. A light bulb went off, so to speak. I have always been someone who gives, who connects, who attaches. Easily. I don't think this is a bad quality but I always found myself getting lost eventually and having a hard time staying grounded when those I were attached or connected to were suffering. The art of detachment says to remain detached is to remain within your own power and your place in this world as a spiritual entity. This resonates with me now, where in the past to be detached I would think meant to be disconnected, heartless, or cruel. I am beginning to see the ways I've given up my power when I've been around those close to me who are suffering. When this would happen, I'd become unhappy, less passionate, less grounded, fearful and uncertain. I like this idea of practicing detachment around others to stay within your own power and thus remain more connected, instead of disconnected. I believe by doing this I'd be a better listener, I'd take more action for myself, lead by example, instead of try to fix something outside myself. I'm going to work on this. It begins with accepting that the future is uncertain. This is actually a reality already, but something I've always resisted. I am moving into what was to be my first home as a family for Josh, Julian and I. Now it will be my home with Julian. Josh will be welcome there of course to see his son, but he will be living elsewhere. I've agreed that space between us is better right now though every time I say this is what I want I have fear around it. Perhaps that's a good thing? I think if I thought back anything I've ever truly wanted has had fear around it. It's not going to be easy but it's going to be ok. Time has proven that to me already with previous struggles. I've got this, keeps popping into my mind. And interestingly enough, this summer has brought a lot of separation into my life. Friends ending relationships, people moving, and just within these last two weeks two relationships of friends I wouldn't have suspected ending, have ended. Or rather are changing. That's how I like to think of it. Separation which is in itself detachment creates space for great change and possibility.