The in between

So the in between ain't fun but it's where the work happens. I'm trudging through, daily highs and lows. Writing in my journal, writing poetry. Here is tonight: I'm at a loss Disbelieving how I got here Unsure of where I'm going I took you for granted I didn't see you when you were allowing yourself to be seen What I see now is someone who's hurting and his actions don't speak to the man he is I'm in the dark Searching for your light When I should be searching for my own I said you don't think you deserve happiness It's me who yearns to feel gratitude for all my many blessings Who still feels broken after all these years Who feels I've once again lost what is given I still have it but can't see it within myself I never thought I'd come this far I never thought I'd lose so much